Texas Bigfoot Attends Secret Meeting at Governor’s Mansion
By Editor | September 25, 2007
Austin, TX — An unnamed source captured provocative photos of the “Texas Bigfoot” sneaking into the governor’s mansion for a midnight meeting.
According to the Texas Bigfoot Research Center, there have been many Bigfoot sightings in Texas, but none in the capital city of Austin. At around 1:00 a.m. on Sunday morning, that all changed.
An unnamed source who if friendly to the Austin Probe took a series of photos that show the Texas Bigfoot surreptitiously entering the governor’s mansion through a side door.
Image: Texas Bigfoot sneaking into the governor’s mansion
An hour later, that same photographer captured the beast exiting the front door of the mansion, walking the wrong way as if disoriented, then turning around (pictured below) and hurrying off the porch to disappear into the Austin night.
Image: Texas Bigfoot leaving the governor’s mansion - disoriented?
The obvious question here is why did the Texas Bigfoot sneak into the governor’s mansion under cover of darkness? What was the great beast up to, and what does it have to do with Governor Perry?
To shed some light on this mystery, we spoke with Buzz Bixby, who operates a one-man Texas Bigfoot research unit based out of Waco. According to Bixby, the late-night rendezvous is not at all surprising:
“It’s well known that Bigfoot is a staunch advocate of forest preservation. He lives among the trees, for Christ’s sake. It’s also well known that Governor Perry is a friend of big business, and that big business is the leading cause of deforestation in the areas where Texas Bigfoot lives. So what you have here, in essence, is a hairy, eight-foot-tall lobbyist looking out for his interests. Hell, who can blame him?”
We were unable to get a comment from Governor Perry’s office regarding the Texas Bigfoot (also known as the Big Cypress Swamp Monster, the Haskell Rascal, and the Turkey Creek Monster), nor would they comment on any forest-preservation legislature that was enacted in response to a Bigfoot visit.
But as always, the Probe will continue to dig … as deeply as necessary.
Sound Off, Austin
Have you seen the Texas Bigfoot in or around Austin? If so, let us know via the “Comments” box below. If you see Bigfoot in the future, we urge you to try and get photos of any kind, even if it puts you in dangerous proximity to the great beast. As the expression goes, sometimes you have to “take one for the team.”
Topics: Austin News |
January 20th, 2008 at 6:37 am
About 5:00am. (today) 1/20/08 in Zanesfiield Ohio a big foot sighting occured when a lady looked out her window and seen it! she quickly called the local police! We have not heard much more about it! yet!
January 20th, 2008 at 8:49 am
Thanks for the notification Brittany. It just goes to show that the “Man of the Woods” is not restricted to the Pacific Northwest for climate reasons, as some have suggested.
January 26th, 2008 at 2:02 pm
that is not big foot. someone cut that photo out and pasted it on the house photo….if you look at both pictures, they are the same pose and the exact same picture. so nice try.
January 26th, 2008 at 2:07 pm
Hi Amy.
Your powers of observation are amazing. You “caught” me posting a parody news story on a website that obviously provides parody news.
Have you given some thought to detective work as a career? If I were you, I would polish up on my use of capital letters, submit a resume to the FBI, and cite your detective work here as an example of your keen attention to detail.
Good luck!
April 23rd, 2008 at 11:44 am
ooooo my god how did you get thoughs pictures
that is the coolest thing ive ever seen besides
… the rest of this comment has been removed due to hate language and profanity. Message posted from within the Lakeland Area Education Agency. Investigation in progress.
Malicious post from a student within Estherville Lincoln Central.
May 7th, 2008 at 11:39 am
yes, i have looked at the photos and who ever sapossivly took this photo isnt really good at covering things up because they are in the exact same pose and why would bigfoot always walk look and even put his hand in the same directioneverywhere he goes.duh if u want to make somthing up do it better next time
Editor’s note: It may help readers to know that the author’s use of “sapossivly” is intended to mean “supposedly.” In addition, the author’s use of “directioneverywhere” is intended to be two words: “direction everywhere.” Hope that helps!